World Peace.

Yep. This is the big one.

People often ask me how to bring about world peace*.  They say to me "Jon, please tell us your genius ideas on how to stop all wars."**
Well, I was thinking about this problem one lunch time around 6 months ago. I was eating a ham sandwich, and within a couple of minutes I'd formulated a solution and finished my sandwich. It goes something like this:

The premise is to have a world-wide collective of peaceful countries. I guess it'd be like the UN. But on a larger scale, and with certain rules. Each country would have benefits in joining this peace collective. (At the time I thought of it, I named it Peace Club, but that just sounds naff. From here on in, let's just call it the Peace Collective until someone comes up with a name that doesn't sound so hippy)

• Any country joining the Peace Collective will automatically reap benefits. Poor countries more so than richer countries. Each country will donate a certain percentage (tbc) of their national exports and/or money to be evenly distributed to all other countries in the collective. - If the country makes cars, then cars are given away, if the country exports rice then rice is given away. This set percentage will remain the same and so the more joinees of the collective, the better it is for everyone.

• Each nation will not be allowed to declare war on any nation within or without the Peace Collective.

• Each nation that has joined will therefore reduce their armed forces drastically. Thus saving more money.

• If any nation within the Collective is attacked, then a Collective army will defend/intervene. This will be comprised of the various/numerous reduced-in-size armed forces of each nation. Therefore each country involved will have a standardised style of army training

Them's the rules. Stick with them and join the Peace Collective.
With more countries involved, the greater the benefits for those involved (including imports and armed forces protection). Thus every country will want to join.

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking:
1) This sounds a bit like communism on a global scale.
2) What about the rich countries? Surely they'll be paying for most of this?
3) What about all the religious wars that are ongoing?

Well let me answer by saying:
1) Yep. That's exactly what it is. Communism is wrong on an individual/national scale... but on a global scale, the world will be a better place. After many years it'd even things out and then it will all seem fairer.
2) Well, yeah they will. To begin with. But surely the reduced cost of America's (come on. That's who we're talking about, and you know it) defences will save them so much money over the years. This is a long term plan. Where everyone wins eventually.
3) Well once most of the world was on the side of the collective army, global impartial decisions will be made to reduce such skirmishes in the middle east.

Ok, so world peace isn't goint to be instantaneous, but it's only gonna take a few decades/generations for it to actually come about. But it would happen. This idea would work. You may say I'm dreamer, but I'm not the only one.

Obviously there's the finer details to iron out, but I think I've sorted out the main issues. There would be no one leader for this Peace Collective. But if people absolutely insist on having a president/king of the world, then they can do far worse that giving the position to the genius who thought up the scheme.

I will now take your questions...




* They don't. It's a big lie.
** Again, no-one has ever asked me this.